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almost 18

my 18th birthday is in less than a week…

i’m not excited.

i’m terrified in fact.

i’ll be officially an adult and once that hits me i’m gonna feel even less accomplished.

for my whole life i’ve felt like i’m super behind everyone else because i was late to the game as far as fashion, social skills, relationships, etc. so now i have a new milestone to say “well i’m an adult and i still haven’t done this” so my self esteem is definitely gonna take a blow on my 18th birthday.

i’ve never been a super happy person on my birthdays because it’s almost always less of an exciting thing for me and more of a reminder that i’m gonna die someday and thus mildly horrifying.

i suppose since this post and my general philosophy are so negative i’ll make some resolutions for my 18th year. i’ve never done new years resolutions but i’ve always silently had goals that i want to reach by a certain age. so before i’m 19…

  • i’ll write 25 songs
  • i’ll improve each language skill by at least one level (i.e beginner to intermediate)
  • i’ll get my blog to 500 wordpress followers
  • i’ll get better at photography.
  • i’ll try to post 1 video per week
  • i’ll lighten my acne scars even more
  • i’ll find a good voice lesson teacher
  • i’ll keep myself from relapsing
  • i’ll remember to take my meds/vitamins daily
  • i’ll reach 700 tumblr followers
  • i’ll always be hydrated
  • i’ll try to minimize the times i break my nails
  • i’ll make 5 new friends

here’s a picture of me before you leave

img_0256
edited in meitu with stickers added in line camera

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i really appreciate my readers ♡

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4 thoughts on “almost 18

  1. Happy birthday!! Girl, I only started caring about fashion after I turned 18 hahaha Everyone lives at a different pace, so there’s no reason to compare yourself with others (easier said than done, I know). It is true that we’re all gonna die, it’s part of life and I think it would be much worse if we didn’t die, can you imagine how old people would be??? And there would definitely be no room for people on earth anymore lol It’s something we can’t control, so it’s better to just love day by day than to worry about when there won’t be a next day. That’s what I think anyways. I’m pretty negative myself, so I may not be great at cheering you up haha. But believe me, you’re so young! You have so much time to accomplish things! I had a professor in university who was a ballet dancer till he was 25 and then he decided to become a psychologist and now he’s super well known in his field! I left everything behind and moved to another country by myself when I was 25 and now I have Canadian education, a full time job, a dog, AND I’m getting married (!!!!!!!). I’m 28 and I feel old but I know I’m still pretty young and I have a lot to look forward in life. And so do you 💖 you have great goals! Try to break them into smaller parts and set a clear timeline to accomplish each smaller part of your goal. That’s the best way to keep track and make sure you can accomplish your goals by next year!

    I feel like this comment is too long now lol But feel free to DM me if you ever feel like chatting! 💜💜

    Liked by 1 person

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