Life Update: November 12th, 2018

I really need to stop trying to write posts soon before I need to leave for work.

Ok, so life update.

I haven’t really given much information about how things are going for me as of late so I feel a need to update everyone on what’s up.

The thing that most people would probably think is the biggest deal is likely that I got my college acceptance letter.

I’m gonna start college in mid-January.

I’m freaked out!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I’ve been doing some of the college prep stuff in my free time; you know: setting up my student ID, emailing people who told me to email them, planning for which orientation I want to go to, trying to get approved for a student credit card, etc.

In a related note, I started another journal (I know I have too many, I just can’t stop). This one I have dubbed my Lifestyle Journal. I basically have been using it to note my information I need for college stuff, planning daily schedules, writing motivational stuff so I can remember to put in effort, brainstorming steps to reach goals, and other stuff.

I have 40 minutes till I need to be clocked in at work. Ugh.

Peanut’s doing OK. She got a hip reduction procedure recently and I hope it’s going to take. I’m so scared that her hip will come back out. I’m trying to keep her drugged up and minimize the amount of physical exertion she partakes in.

I really like my bangs if you wanted a bangs update.

I’ll do an ED update soon but basically I’ve had really strong urges lately.

I haven’t been my productive self as of late. I’ve been in a pretty depressive state (could you tell by my lack of activity?) and I’m trying to pull myself out of it. I’m hoping this dark cloud on m life will clear up by December.

Oh! Speaking of December, I’ve been doing research on driver’s ed and I’m hoping to do my drivers ed stuff throughout December.

Well, I need to start leaving so I’m gonna finish of this entry.

Thanks for reading!


My Plan for Winter

It feels like this blog is just gonna become a compilation of me complaining about how I’m dissatisfied with my life.

I just want everything in my life to go well but it feels like that won’t be happening.


Let’s discuss the plan.

Yesterday I spent a while in an existential state of discomfort because I remembered that death is inevitable so at some point I’ll have to do something so I don’t die a nobody.

As I always do, I made a to do list.

The plan lasts over the course of the rest of 2018 and the entirety of 2019.

I won’t give out details because I keep my tricks secret, but I’ll tell you the plan for November.

Since my work schedule will be increasing in hours, I’m gonna probably lose sleep for the sake of this but essentially:

  • blog daily
  • post on instagram daily
  • follow my tumblr post schedule (that I set up in September and have yet to follow)
  • Stream on Twitch at least 4 times a week
  • promo promo promo
  • take as many photos as possible (even if it’s a photo of grass, blog posts with photos get more reads)
  • study 1 hour every day

I sang on Twitch yesterday and was very pleasantly surprised that people thought I was good at all. My next big purchase will be a sufficient microphone so that I can record higher quality audio of my voice because it turns out I’m not the least talented person on earth.

The ultimate dream is to make a career out of singing (my plan is basically to replicate Troye Sivan but not make Troye Sivan-esque music), so November is basically a month to try to build an audience to want to listen to me.

I don’t know if you’ve heard a lot about how Destiny’s Child trained, but I’ll give you a basic idea of it.

In the summer, Matthew Knowles would put the girls through “summer camp” where they would do things like jog while singing (to increase their lung capacity), dance for hours, diet (this one is only a rumor), and take long voice lessons.

I want to do a “summer camp” for myself.

I’ve decided my “summer camp” will be from November to the beginning of January.

I’m not only going to be putting a lot of effort into my planned endeavors, I’ll also be putting a lot of effort into things like the health of my hair and remembering to take vitamins, and pushing myself further in my stretches. Daily things that can build up, you know?

I’m gonna be better.

I’m gonna be the best at something.

I’m gonna sound like less of a crazy person. (that’s the comedic relief if you didn’t catch on)


I’ll keep you updated on my self improvement hopefully.

I have to go to work in 2 hours and I need to shower so I should do that now so my hair will be even the slightest bit dry by the time I’m at work, so I’ll leave you right now.


Organization for October

What’s up duderinos.

I feel an urge to post twice today because my first entry of the day was just photos, so…

Here’s some words.

I guess I’ll give an update on my life organization stuff since a lot of people are interested in that concept.

My Bullet Journal

I worked on my October setup in my bullet journal today and I kinda like how it’s coming along. I’ve been focusing more on aesthetics in my new bullet journal so I really try to embellish my monthly setups and my weekly spreads.

My October theme is of course halloween. I kinda wanted to do a fruit theme but I love my skeleton washi tape and I think it would be pretty tough to incorporate a skeleton into a watermelon themed weekly spread, you know?

If there’s one thing you may need to know about me in regards to my bullet journaling, it’s that I’m particularly mediocre at drawing so my doodles and hand drawn embellishments are pretty rough.

I’ve added a few new things to my monthly habit tracker at the expense of other habits that I just wasn’t benefiting from tracking. So now “study Swahili” is in the place of “fill up humidifier” and network” took the place of something I forgot that was in my old bullet journal. Networking to me is stuff like commenting and emailing other bloggers, taking part in facebook threads, and pitching guest posts if you were wondering.

My Traveler’s Notebook

I really think I’m benefiting from my foreign language journal in my TN, but I always forget to write in it! I maybe should have added that to my habit tracker, but I didn’t have anything else to remove. 😦 I also like having a dedicated diary. It makes my weekly spreads less cramped. My et cetera notebook has been given a purpose as a planning and goals notebook where I work on the small steps to reaching longer term goals.

I also added some cute stickers in my folder.

My Planner

It’s kinda nice to have a big, stratified planner. I like having it on my desk to release the concepts and timetables from my mind onto paper. I think it’s decreasing my stress to not have to remember everything.


Goals (hold me accountable)

I have a few goals for October I think are safe to release into the public so here’s a few:

  • post 6 youtube videos (aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAA)
  • send in my college application before the priority deadline
  • write at least 20 entries in my diary
  • post all of my october bullet journal weekly spreads
  • reach 10 youtube subscribers
  • email 2 publications
  • take more pictures of Peanut and Poptart
  • do a good photoshoot for Maddie
  • save at least 30 dollars

The rest of my goals, I’ll keep private unless another goal comes to mind that I want to tell y’all.

So thanks for reading, maybe this gave you ideas for organizing and planning. I’ll try to make good on all of my goals and if you see me slacking, yell at me.


Travelers Notebook!

I got my first ever Travelers Notebook in the mail yesterday!

So excited!!!!

**✿❀ ❀✿**

I’ll just give a rundown of how I’ll be using it before I link to my TN setup video below.

I’ll be using one insert as a catchall creative space, one as a sketchbook, one to write a sentence in another language each day, one as a diary, and a folder insert to hold stickers!

I think I’ll probably add in an insert so I can take notes when I learn new things on the go.

here’s a link to my setup video!

Setup Video!

beauty · lifestyle

acne scars

check out this zit i have


yes. it is under my nostril.

it is causing me palpable pain and i really wanna pop it.

the problem is that whenever i’ve popped zits in the past i end up with gigantic dark acne scars. i really don’t need a scar right under my nose right now.

i’ve wanted to post about my acne scars for a while because i’m kinda proud of my progress in getting rid of them over the past roughly 4 months.

you’re gonna get to see some totally unedited photos of my forehead now just so you can see the change in my scars.

early june
literally taken at 15:00 today with the unflattering iphone flash WHILE I HAVE A TAN

my skin always looks terrible when i get tanner (one more good reason to avoid the sun) so me being tanned and having not so awful scars is impressive

my scars are by no means gone but i have made some leeway on getting rid of them.

so i might as well give you my tips since you’re reading, right?

  1. wash your face daily (no brainer but some people don’t do it and wonder why their skin is bad)
  2. exfoliate 2-3 times per week
  3. use “brightening” face masks after exfoliating at least once per week
  4. use a witch hazel toner after cleansing daily
  5. use a tone correcting moisturizer (i won’t reveal which one i use because it turns out it isn’t cruelty free  (*≧m≦*) )
  6. drink a metric fuckton of water (i drink 4 liters daily)
  7. take probiotics (i don’t know if this is actually causing a change in my skin but i started taking probiotics at the same time as beginning my skin journey)
  8. be vegan? i don’t know thats basically my diet summed up i kinda just eat whatever’s vegan


they’re pretty basic tips.

it makes me happy to see some progress with my acne scars because honestly i hate wearing foundation. it’s just so annoying to remove. i wanna be one of those girls that goes viral online for having “glass skin” and every day i’m getting closer. watch your back.





austin trip day 1

so, our family friend Karma took my mother and i on a trip to austin for her birthday!

so we began our road trip at 9:30 and arrived at about 14:00. on the way we made a few stops but the most notable one was a visit to bucees. if you haven’t heard of bucees it’s like a mix of a convenience store, a pier 1, a gas station, and a toy store. we spent about an hour there. i got a new shirt and some socks there and i’m very happy with them. (thanks Karma)

some standard central texas nothingness
outside austin (can you see the capitol building)
proof we went to bucees
a close up of my very very cute duffel bag stuffed to the brim with about 9 outfits for a 3 day trip

so when we arrived we dropped our things off at the air bnb (this is my first time staying at an airbnb) and then went to HEB to get groceries. i almost both had a panic attack and passed out from low blood sugar so to say it nicely i had a tough time in HEB. but who cares because i found a bottle of whataburger ketchup there and it was on sale.

after HEB we sat around in the airbnb for a while doing not much until we went to get a tarot card reading for my mom and karma.

my room
the cool ikea lamp in my room
living room (very texan)
upstairs sitting area
the little table upstairs
my ootd (mostly from amazon)

we then went to an italian food truck where i got some pesto pasta that turned out to be too spicy for my weak self. i could only eat about 30% of it before going on a mad dash for water.

fiery death pesto

sorry i didn’t post for two days i felt awful on monday and yesterday the photos wouldn’t upload

obligatory photo of me in my bucees shirt masking

AP exam prep

this year i’ve been preparing for my AP exams in a different way than i have in the past. since i’ve missed almost the entire school year i’m basically self taught, therefore my test prep is intense.

i have 5 steps to a 5 books for all of the subjects i’m testing in (biology, english literature, US government, and macroeconomics) and i’ve taken dedicated notes to all available powerpoints from my teachers, my textbooks, novels i’ve read, and my 5 steps to a 5 books.

for my 5 steps to a 5 notes ive used a technique that i got from youtube in which you use note cards and washi tape to make small portable notebooks for a specific topic, subject, or concept. i’ll be using these for last minute cram sessions before the exams.

government cram booklet
english lit cram booklet

note: these images only show a few pages of my booklets.

for my general notes i’ve used dot grid notebooks to take notes on my textbooks and powerpoints.

a few pages of my plant notes for ap biology
notes for macroeconomics

so, my plan for this week and the next is that i’ll:

  • finish my cram booklets
  • read through my whole notebooks each day
  • read through the cram booklets an hour before each test
  • write 1 last essay for each class using a prompt i haven’t used before 2 days before each test

i’m not super stressed about the ap exams but i am concerned about my finals and my grades. once i’m done with my ap exams i’ll hopefully rehab my grades and study for my finals.

the washi tape i used is MT washi tape, my colored pens are pilot 0.38 juice pens, my black pens are muji 0.38 pens, and my dot grid notebooks are from miliko and all of these items are available on amazon.


May 3rd, 2018

note:  i thought it would be cool to try one of these day in the life style posts so bear with me

today i woke up at about 4;45 am. i stretched and ate breakfast (sourdough toast, cranberry juice, and soymilk). my morning was ruined when as i did my hair i saw this fucker:


on my chest. i screeched and was then terrified of going in my bathroom so i didn’t wear makeup today.

then i went to school.

at school i got a test back in my 1st class (i got a 95) and drank about 1 liter of water by 9am. this post is mainly to complain about my second class: choir. i generally like choir but recently it’s been just about awful. we’re partner dancing and my partner is sending me to the end of my rope. he’s one of those teenage boys that think that everyone should bend to his every whim. as of today he has: yelled at me for messing up once, complained to my face about how he wishes he had a different partner totally didn’t make me insecure, and openly made fun of one of my friends right next to me getting mad at me when i told him to stop. today i was at the end of my rope when he completely ignored me and went to the other side of the room to fuck around with his friend so of course i did what i had to do. i asked my teacher (who is always forced to be on his case) to get onto him for his fuckery. i don’t know what she did about it but i saw that she called him into her office so i feel accomplished and i feel almost as though i’ve stood up for myself even though i went through a proxy. 

here’s me today:


for lunch i had :lentils and rice, seaweed, and walnuts odd combination i know 

in my third class we took a test and then did a practice ap exam which i got 90% of the questions correct on. and lastly in my fourth class we wrote an essay.

when i got home i made some chickpea cookie dough and had that as i did some homework with my dogs.

i had an award ceremony for my school and i wore this:


my mirror is gross

i got a plaque for being an AP Scholar with Distinction.

now i’m getting ready to go to bed.

ps. the fucker is on the ceiling of my bathroom right above my toilet currently so i’m scared to pee.

pps. the color this post is written in is “grayish blue”


an act of self care

if you go to my school and you reading this you may have your final conversation with me this week. don’t worry, i’m not gonna do anything bad but if i find you to be an asshole, bigoted, or just unpleasant to be around you’ll be receiving a unique response if you try to speak to me.

if you approach me and you’re unpleasant i will be responding “in an act of self care i’ve decided to not interact with you”

i believe that (a)this is a very kind way to get people to not interact with me anymore and (b) i am not required to converse with anyone i don’t want to deal with, so if you have an issue with me saying this to you don’t worry you can take your complaints to twitter where i probably already have you blocked and (c) it’s better to tell people you won’t interact with them is better than giving them the silent treatment.

i know that this blog post is quite a bit more negative in tone than normal but honestly every day at my school i deal with some bottom of the barrel humans and i’m not going to put up with it anymore.

now while we’re here talking self care i want to tell you about the new habits i’ve added to my habit tracker.

new habits include:

  • took probiotics
  • posted on social media
  • organized
  • tracked meals
  • took photos
  • did schoolwork
  • detangled hair
  • journaled

some old habits that are returning are

  • ate 3 meals
  • attempted self care
  • stretched
  • studied korean
  • lifestyle designed
  • and many more

i’m working on upping my activity level, working on my online presence, and getting more used to stress this upcoming month even though it’s my last month of high school because i really wanna start getting prepped for college early.

i’m really craving sourdough right now. hopefully i’ll buy some the next time i go shopping.

i don’t know why i told you that this is kind of a stream of consciousness right now.

heres a picture of poptart



my worst habit

i have a very maladaptive, impractical, time consuming, money grubbing, gross, stupid, inexplicable habit.


i collect everything that i like.


as of right now i collect:

  • stuffed animals
  • body spray
  • eyeshadow
  • disney tsum tsums
  • jelly shoes
  • disney ufufys
  • stationary
  • grippy socks
  • vintage panties
  • lotion
  • leggings
  • floral arrangements
  • paper copies of epic poems
  • pens
  • wide legged pants
  • turtlenecks
  • and to an extent pets

i’m sure that that’s not even the whole list.

this is an awful habit that i realized i had as i left the disney store with a bag of disney ufufys and decided that that would be my newest obsession. this habit is especially insidious as i don’t even realize that i collect these things until i have an impractical amount of the items i so dearly love. and once i love them  can’t get rid of them.


am i a hoarder?



i just like so many things and can’t resist things i like so much.

one thing i’d like to comment on is how saying you collect something is looked upon so much more positively than admitting you have a hoarding problem. what’s up with that? the only difference i see between those at home museums and the houses on hoarders is that the people on hoarders don’t put up as many shelves.

i’m just gonna call myself a maximalist and live in peace with my mountains of stuff.