I want to sleep

I’m here, don’t worry.

I really don’t want to write because I’m so sleepy so I’ll just let you know I’m here and tomorrows post will be a thing.

My orientation was today and it was very…….


You’ll learn more later.

ok, sleep now


A Taste of Fame & Toxicity

A word I think has been really overused by people in the general vicinity of my demographic is toxic. I think a lot of people around my demo use the word toxic in situations where it truly does not apply in the slightest.

What happened to the word mean? or rude? or sh*tty?

Why is every person who makes a mistake *`^~toxic~^`* now?

I make it a point to avoid using the word toxic as a descriptor entirely just because it’s so grossly misused and overused.

That changes today.

I officially declare that:



That took a lot to get off of my chest.

So if you don’t follow celebrity news I’ll give you a quick rundown of the situation that led to today.

So a few years ago, Ariana Grande (a pop singer) and Mac Miller (a rapper) were dating. They lasted a good while in hollywood terms and then broke up. Pretty soon after news came out that Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson (from SNL, one of my favorite SNL cast members btw) were not only dating, but engaged. They were super public about it; didn’t hide from paparazzi, got matching tattoos, she had a song named after him on her album, they got a pet pig together, everything. A while later, Mac Miller died from an overdose. Not quickly after, people started to blame Ariana for his death. *note: there was also a bombing at an Ariana Grande concert a while ago which she was also blamed for somehow* So things haven’t been coming up milhouse for Ariana Grande and then guess what? Yep, her and Pete Davidson break up. She then releases the song Thank U, Next and people say she’s capitalizing off of her exes pain and whatever else (p.s please can this song get less airtime? I get that it’s catchy but jesus)

And today we found out that Pete Davidson has been suicidal.

So a lot of people (including high profile celebrities like Kanye West and Nicki Minaj) have been chiming in. Takes range from “we need to focus on Ariana’s mental health”, to “this is all Ariana’s fault and she’s toxic”, to “Nicki Minaj needs to shut the hell up”, to “could we maybe try to help the guy who threatened suicide?”

So here is where we start talking about the fanbase. AG’s fans have been sending death threats and hateful messages to Pete Davidson for months now. And now that he’s suicidal the prevailing take I’ve seen from her fans is that we should focus on Ariana Grande’s mental health. That in and of itself is fine.

Now Ariana fans have been leaving a deluge of the same annoying comebacks as always on any critical tweet.

Listen, here’s an open letter to twitter stans:

Please, for the love of god, come up with better comebacks. Responding “THAnK yOu, NeXt” under everything has not been witty since the first time somebody did it. Ya’ll are annoying and lack the slightest grasp of comedy. You think you’re funny but you aren’t. It’s literally so easy to respond to people in a witty, sassy way. These canned responses that signify which fandom clan you belong to make you look like you’re jumping at the chance to matter. Thank you.

So here’s where I become a part of this. And by a part of this I mean I’m like a skin tag.

So Andy Milonakis has been tweeting shady stuff about Ariana Grande pretty much all day (I think he might be friends with Pete Davidson, but I don’t know). I don’t agree with a lot of the stuff he’s been saying (although I did find one of his tweets funny), but I saw a reply that I thought was really dumb. Somebody responded to Andy’s tweet with “the locals gettin bold today i see”. For those of you who don’t interact much with twitter stans, a “local” is a catchall term that people whose life is twitter use to insult people with lives or people who are “irrelevant”.

That’s dumb, dude.

So of course I responded: “andy milonakis has been famous for over a decade”.

Well… My tweet has been viewed over 20,000 times now.


I thought it would be pretty much a throw away statement but I guess not…

So of course I’m no online personality now, but I’ve been getting a few responses an hour and that has motivated me to further investigate the Ariana Grande fanbase.

Bad idea.

Now just to be transparent, I’ve had a negative leaning perception of her fans ever since they sent xenophobic messages to Kris Wu in droves when his album charted better than hers. He’s chinese! He’s huge in China! In what world do you think a huge Chinese celebrity would underperform in the charts!? There’s like 2 billion people in China!

So I saw some stuff. Hate towards BTS (who have never done anything to deserve the hate they receive btw), death threats to Pete Davidson who they know is suicidal, and all sorts of corny, mean garbage.

And this was just what I found when I searched “Ariana Grande” on twitter.

I’m sure there’s some fandom slang too but I don’t like Ariana Grande’s music enough to learn her fan lingo. (not to say I dislike her music of course, I love No Tears Left To Cry, God Is A Woman, Into You, and a bunch of her other songs. I just don’t put effort into supporting artists whose b-sides I don’t consistently listen to and enjoy)

Now, those of you acquainted with twitter fans may say “but you like BTS and their fans suck!”.

This is a game of statistics my dude. BTS’s fans rarely send death threats and I’ve never seen one be xenophobic (and of course this is my opinion and it has very little influence in the world.)

I just hope Ariana Grande gets better fans. I hope in the near future we can avoid being subjected to annoying, copy-and-pasted “clapbacks” on twitter. I hope that Kris Wu will receive retribution for the hatred he’s received simply for making music. And I hope some day we’ll all wake up and realize BTS and Beyonce are producing the most consistently great pop culture content on earth and they deserve all of our attention.


I kinda just wanted to post my screenshot on my blog and here I am after writing an over 1,000 word post about things that barely matter.

Thanks for reading!

BTW, my tweet has over 25,000 views now after typing all of this.

Future Changes

Would you look at that, I’m not stuck at work until past 21:30 today!

I hate it that I feel lost when I’m not busy.

I miss that feeling of motivation to do things I like that I had in the past. I’m trying to force myself to do things like blogging so that I can maybe regain what I’ve lost.

When you don’t have as many hours in a day to do what matters to you it feels like those things matter less to you, you know?

I’m hoping to spend the rest of today, tomorrow, and parts of sunday getting my mind together. I would really like to brainstorm a way to better balance my life. It feels like I’m doing that weekly though and it never bears fruit.

Maybe things will get better once I start school and have a more consistent schedule (that’s a long shot).

I often wonder why people take the time out of their day to read my blog when I don’t really have much to say a lot of the time.

I really want to do right by my readership by crafting interesting content.

I’m thinking maybe I’ll branch out from just writing personal posts to maybe writing about fashion and such. I tried to do that towards the beginning of my blog, but I think I’m in a better place to make that sort of stuff now. I’m thinking maybe I’ll do OOTD’s and maybe reviews? Of course the personal stuff won’t go away though.

I’m gonna try to force myself to take more pictures as well because I know these walls of text can kind of be exhausting. I tend to feel a bit more proud of my posts with photos as well, so that would probably help me with my motivation.

I think once I can drive my posts may improve as well. I’ll probably feel more inspired when I’m out in the world rather than in the 2 very exotic settings of my home and my work.

I’m gonna brainstorm offline.

Thanks for reading.

Contacts, Schedules, Whatever

ooh late post

I don’t have a ton to say right now because I’m tired and I really want to go to sleep but I know I should post just for the habit of it.

I’m up for a busy few days soon.

On Saturday I’m taking my required drivers ed course, on Sunday I’m probably gonna be working over 8 hours, and on Monday I have my orientation.

I don’t like having obligations every day that aren’t a part of a daily routine.

I think I would definitely prefer if my work schedule was consistent rather than different times each day, you know?

Maybe it’s actually that I just hate doing things I don’t want to do.

I can imagine that if I was a celebrity I would enjoy stuff like award shows that aren’t routine. I probably just hate boring stuff.

I hope that I get to do cool stuff often in the future.


I really don’t have much on my mind.

I think I want to start wearing contacts more.

I don’t have many contacts right now so I wear them super sparingly, but I think when I get my next prescription I’ll order a lot of contacts.

Weird question:

Are circle lenses super out of vogue nowadays?

I remember when everyone that was cool wore circle lenses, but I haven’t seen many people wearing them for the past like 2 years. There’s a pair of really cool lenses that have pink and black tulips on the edges that make your eyes look frilly that I really really want to buy.

It’s not that I want to fit in badly, but I keep talking myself out of buying them.

I also want to buy a pair of sclera lenses.

I think that would be cool. I’ve always wanted to look like I’m possessed.

It’s hard to talk yourself into spending money on cosmetic lenses.

Wow, how vapid.

I think I’m too tired to be blogging right now.

Have a nice night!

Oddly Specific GIFs

What’s up?

I don’t have much to say today but I’d like to introduce you all to one of my new favorite things.

So if you weren’t around for the early-mid 2000’s internet, you may have never heard of a thing called a blinkie.

Blinkies are gifs that pretty much just blink.

Like the signs on the outside of a gas station.

So I’ve recently really loved to save oddly specific blinkies and just… look at them I guess.

Here’s a few of my favorites:


Obviously I’m partial to opossum themed blinkies.

So that’s all I’ve got for you today…

Thanks for reading.


Astrology Jokes

I enjoyed writing an opinion piece the other day.

I used to write roughly one opinion piece per week a long while ago, but I kinda stopped writing them. I think I’m gonna try to write one whenever I have a good thought about something.

Today’s topic is gonna be astrology.

I think I’ve been witness to a pretty interesting trend that seems especially apparent in my age range.

I don’t really know how to name this trend but I’d describe it as a renewed interest in superstition. (Somebody’s probably gonna get mad at me for calling these things superstitions)

It seems like the people who’ve developed these interests really overlap a lot. Interests these people hold include but aren’t limited to:

  • witchcraft/ wicca
  • paganism
  • astrology
  • “the cosmos”
  • pagan imagery
  • conflating religion and “traditionalism”
  • anarchism
  • “alternative aesthetics”
  • etc etc, you know the people I’m talking about

So to get you off the edge of your eat I’m just gonna say it.

I don’t believe in astrology.

or wicca, or paganism, or that christians are bigots, or that hot pink hair looks good on most people

I’ve noticed especially on twitter that there’s a big trend or people who love astrology making the same joke about how boring people don’t believe in astrology and it pisses me off.

This trend seems painfully similar to how so many preachers/ministers/whatever they’re called will make making fun of atheists a crux of multiple sermons.

I really, truly do not care in the slightest about people who think astrology is a good explanation for happening in the world, I swear.

I do care about dismissive, straw-manning, self-righteous dweebs though.

Is it that hard to not be annoying?

I sure as hell don’t believe in astrology but I’m not telling people who do that they’re idiots. Why are so many skeptical people doing that?

And astrology-believers…

Stop it with the jokes.

They were probably funny for a grand total of 3 tweets.

It’s stale now.

Watch some stand up, I swear it’s better than this “every person I’ve ever met who doesn’t believe in astrology is a boring straight white man heblehblehblehbleh” tweet that y’all are changing 3 words to and reposting for your own gain.

I’ll even recommend you some comedians:

  • Joel Kim Booster
  • John Mulaney
  • Hannah Gadsby
  • Mike Birbiglia
  • Bert Kreischer
  • Iliza Schleschinger
  • geez, watch between two ferns, just stop tweeting the same thing over and over


Rediscovery: GMM

Hi again.

I’m trying to get an entry out there before my dinner is done in the oven.

I think I’m getting sick right now.

I’ve had a bad headache since I woke up, I coughed so hard I almost vomited earlier, and my nose has been running like a broken faucet my whole work day.


I don’ really have much to talk about, but I’ve rediscovered something I used to love…

I’ve started watching good mythical morning again.

I haven’t reaslly watched GMM in a long time, but I’ve listened to Rhett and Link’s podcast religiously since like 2013.

I quite like GMM still.

I used to watch an episode every night before I went to bed for like 3 years.

um… so…

That’s about all that’s new in my life.