BKchat, tumblr, and incels

I have no idea where this post is gonna go, but I’m going to write anyway. I think I’m gonna write one paragraph about whatever comes to mind until I feel satisfied.

I just got off work, which is super great. I strongly prefer the days when I work early and leave early over days where I show up later and close the store.

Yesterday I took a lot of photos. I photographed Posh and Samoa, Maddie, and myself. I’m still in the process of editing them though, so you guys will see them some time in the near future.

Recently I’ve really enjoyed a show called bkchat london. I often saw people on twitter talk about stuff the people on bkchat said and I never felt particularly compelled to spend like an hour listening to people debate about relatively simple (in my eyes) subjects. But I watched an episode the other day and realized the show is actually pretty interesting (although I wish the cast wouldn’t yell over each other every 25 seconds). It’s interesting to hear people who have views that I’d never even thought people had.

We got Marshmallows ashes yesterday. It’s weird, I thought I was pretty well recovered, but I guess I’m not. The second I took out the urn, I started sobbing. I just feel really  bad. I miss him a lot.

I’m still figuring out college stuff. I have to do financial aid online paperwork stuff… Not enthused.

Have y’all heard about how tumblr is banning adult content? I’m worried they may start hunting down anyone who posts anything nsfw (i.e discussions of sexual assault). When the news came out, a lot of people started passing around an article about how a lot of women discover and prefer viewing p*rn on tumblr. I think it’s odd that people have taken this information and used it as a gotcha to tumblr that they shouldn’t ban adult content so women can watch p*rn. I don’t wanna sound like a prude but… If tumblr has to ban all adult content so that there won’t be as big of a child p*rnography problem, I value the safety of children 5000 times more than the feelings of women who use tumblr to get off.

Have you guys also heard about all the incel dudes reporting s*x workers with premium snapchats to the IRS? That’s so odd to me. I don’t want to entirely reveal my stance because I don’t want people to say “oh so you have s*x workers?” because that’s what I’ve seen a lot of super liberal feminists say when anyone offers the slightest bit of criticism toward the s*x industry. What I will say is that I’m not particularly fond of the majority of the s*x industry, but just because you may think “p*rn is bad” or that you’re bitter about pretty women not talking to you, you don’t need to try to ruin people’s lives. ugh.

This post really meanders, doesn’t it?

Tomorrow I have a psychiatrist appointment. I’m excited to get out. It’ feels like for the past month I’ve gone to work, come home, and maybe if I’m feeling wild I’ll go to the grocery store. I wouldn’t say I’m a homebody or a person who needs to constantly be out and about, but I really do enjoy the occasional outing.

ok. I’m gonna go now, I need to study.

Thanks for reading.

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Let’s Bring Back Blog Awards

OK, lots to talk about.

I’m gonna try to organize this in as easily understandable of a way as is possible.

I want an award.

I’ve mentioned multiple times on this blog that I am a very proud lover of attention. I like when people look at me, I like applause (it was my biggest motivator when I was acting), I like praise, I even like when people stare at me. In fact I would go so far as to say that I love those things.

One thing that I think my attention seeking journey is missing is a laundry list of accolades. I love it when people talk about Beyonce (my absolute idol) and they mention that she’s the third most decorated musician ever.

Well, a fun fact about me is that I’ve never really won anything.

I won a metal for a robot building competition (it was actually 2 metals, but I wanna seem humble) when I was 11 and I have 2 “AP scholar with distinction” awards, but other than that I can’t think of a time that I actually won in a competition. I was never an athlete when I was a kid and I was never a particularly memorable person when I did choir and theatre, so it’s no surprise that I don’t know what winning feels like.

That’s very disheartening though.

I want to feel proud of myself!

So where do blog awards factor into this?

Well, I don’t like to admit it but I was huge fan of Xiaxue when I was a kid. Every day I would read her blog and go through her archives. I even looked through the hate site she made for herself!

But of all of the content Xiaxue has put out in her over 15 years blogging and instagramming and doing whatever she does nowadays, my favorite thing she ever put online was her blog post about the 2011 Nuffnang Asia-Pacific Blog Awards. It seemed so glamorous and so interesting and it seemed like something to really be proud of but above all it seemed approachable. It felt like if you just made a blog and worked hard enough, you could get glory. That was why I started my awful first blog back in 2012 and that attainable glamour is a big motivator when I can’t get out a post on here.

So if you didn’t read all of that, I just really wanna win something for once.

What happened to blog awards?

I don’t really know.

I’ve been meditating on this idea for about a month and a half, and I’ve done quite a bit of research. I found one active blog award situation in Ireland for Irish bloggers so that was disappointing. I also found some “if you get tagged you win and then you have to tag 15 other bloggers” style blog awards but that isn’t what I want.

I don’t wanna win a meaningless award based on the fact that I’m good acquaintances with someone.

I want a popular vote.

 

What are we gonna do about this?

Well, I want to see if anyone would participate in this first.

So here’s my call to action:

If you want to have the chance to win an award or you want to see some of your favorite bloggers possibly win awards, please complete this google form. It’ll take like 2 minutes at the most.

https://goo.gl/forms/PBpZYpVD7lbXUxMU2

If you can’t complete the google form, please like this post to show that you want a real, competitive blog award “ceremony” and/or comment about what you want me to do for this.

I’m thinking I’d like to maybe crowd fund this I can get real trophies made (and maybe give out a small cash prize) and I’ll also make a little thumbnail so you can put it on your blog as a widget? I don’t know I’ll plan more if people actually want to do this. I know I can’t create an actual award show because nobody would fly somewhere for a silly blog award nowadays. If I get really into this I may even use my own money, but that’s not a promise.

This will probably be pretty makeshift, but I think it could be cool.

I really wanna make this happen.

So please fill out my google form!

*authors note: I know this is probably anticlimactic since I’ve been working on it for like 5 days but I had to research blog awards and I’ve even gone so far as to figure out how much it would cost to make a trophy and I’ve looked into crowd funding websites, like I’ve really been putting effort into this concept that might not even happen. So please give me feedback and tell me what you want to come of this. ♡♡♡*