Not At Home

Hi again!

I’m not at my house for once.

It’s probably been like 5 months since I spent the night somewhere other than my house.

I’m spending pre-christmas festivities with my dad’s area of the family.

I don’t know exactly what to talk about and I haven’t take any pictures yet…

But there are horses here!

So hopefully I’ll get some horse pictures for you all.

I’m gonna be reclusive for a while today and try to finish my college orientation and other posts.

I just got onto the wifi so I’m just trying to actually put some work into my blog.

The grind never stops.

I hate the word grind.

The italics imply a tone of disgust.


I’ll probably be back on my blog later today so I’ll see you then.


Drivers Ed

So I don’t talk about it a lot because it doesn’t matter but I don’t have my drivers license yet.

I’ll give you a quick rundown of what one has to do to get a drivers license above the age of 18 where I live.

  • take a required 6 hour class
  • take a driving test
  • get license

I think that’s a pretty short list.

In comparison, the teenagers have to take a class, have over 30 logged hours driving, have a drivers permit for 6 months, have very stringent restrictions on their license for a year, and then they can drive however they please.

So I took the first step to getting my license this past Saturday.

I took my 6 hour course and I’d like to tell you about it.

I came to the driving school at about 7:45 and sat waiting for the class to begin at 8:00.




The class did not begin at 8:00.

There were only 5 people in my class and 3 out of 5 of them were late.

So when they finally arrived, the class began.

My classmates consisted of a girl who moved here from New York (where they have worthwhile public transportation), a girl who has been driving illegally without a license for 3 years,  a 20-something DJ who had an affinity for staring at me, and a 60 year old man who recently moved here from Nigeria.

We’re like a group of rejected X-men.

So what actually happened in the class is pretty expected. We read the DMV drivers handbook and got lectured.

I would like to tell you about a video they made us watch, however.

I wish I remembered the title of it, but I’ll give you a synopsis.

Long, drawn out footage of dead bodies hanging out of cars with the reason they crashed written on screen.

That’s it.

Just gore and “eating a cheeseburger while driving”.

After doing some mundane studying and watching the aforementioned snuff film, we took 2 tests.

I got a perfect score on both of them so I was able to leave an hour early while the people who didn’t score as well were offered retakes.

I took a bit of time to camwhore in the bathroom which was shockingly nice.


do you see that in the background? it’s a holder for a scented candle. the candle was pine scented which made me super nauseous

Another great post, Mikah.

Thanks Mikah.

I hope the readers liked it just as much.

*both Mikahs look into the camera and laugh in a very sitcom manner*

*family matters laugh track*

A Taste of Fame & Toxicity

A word I think has been really overused by people in the general vicinity of my demographic is toxic. I think a lot of people around my demo use the word toxic in situations where it truly does not apply in the slightest.

What happened to the word mean? or rude? or sh*tty?

Why is every person who makes a mistake *`^~toxic~^`* now?

I make it a point to avoid using the word toxic as a descriptor entirely just because it’s so grossly misused and overused.

That changes today.

I officially declare that:



That took a lot to get off of my chest.

So if you don’t follow celebrity news I’ll give you a quick rundown of the situation that led to today.

So a few years ago, Ariana Grande (a pop singer) and Mac Miller (a rapper) were dating. They lasted a good while in hollywood terms and then broke up. Pretty soon after news came out that Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson (from SNL, one of my favorite SNL cast members btw) were not only dating, but engaged. They were super public about it; didn’t hide from paparazzi, got matching tattoos, she had a song named after him on her album, they got a pet pig together, everything. A while later, Mac Miller died from an overdose. Not quickly after, people started to blame Ariana for his death. *note: there was also a bombing at an Ariana Grande concert a while ago which she was also blamed for somehow* So things haven’t been coming up milhouse for Ariana Grande and then guess what? Yep, her and Pete Davidson break up. She then releases the song Thank U, Next and people say she’s capitalizing off of her exes pain and whatever else (p.s please can this song get less airtime? I get that it’s catchy but jesus)

And today we found out that Pete Davidson has been suicidal.

So a lot of people (including high profile celebrities like Kanye West and Nicki Minaj) have been chiming in. Takes range from “we need to focus on Ariana’s mental health”, to “this is all Ariana’s fault and she’s toxic”, to “Nicki Minaj needs to shut the hell up”, to “could we maybe try to help the guy who threatened suicide?”

So here is where we start talking about the fanbase. AG’s fans have been sending death threats and hateful messages to Pete Davidson for months now. And now that he’s suicidal the prevailing take I’ve seen from her fans is that we should focus on Ariana Grande’s mental health. That in and of itself is fine.

Now Ariana fans have been leaving a deluge of the same annoying comebacks as always on any critical tweet.

Listen, here’s an open letter to twitter stans:

Please, for the love of god, come up with better comebacks. Responding “THAnK yOu, NeXt” under everything has not been witty since the first time somebody did it. Ya’ll are annoying and lack the slightest grasp of comedy. You think you’re funny but you aren’t. It’s literally so easy to respond to people in a witty, sassy way. These canned responses that signify which fandom clan you belong to make you look like you’re jumping at the chance to matter. Thank you.

So here’s where I become a part of this. And by a part of this I mean I’m like a skin tag.

So Andy Milonakis has been tweeting shady stuff about Ariana Grande pretty much all day (I think he might be friends with Pete Davidson, but I don’t know). I don’t agree with a lot of the stuff he’s been saying (although I did find one of his tweets funny), but I saw a reply that I thought was really dumb. Somebody responded to Andy’s tweet with “the locals gettin bold today i see”. For those of you who don’t interact much with twitter stans, a “local” is a catchall term that people whose life is twitter use to insult people with lives or people who are “irrelevant”.

That’s dumb, dude.

So of course I responded: “andy milonakis has been famous for over a decade”.

Well… My tweet has been viewed over 20,000 times now.


I thought it would be pretty much a throw away statement but I guess not…

So of course I’m no online personality now, but I’ve been getting a few responses an hour and that has motivated me to further investigate the Ariana Grande fanbase.

Bad idea.

Now just to be transparent, I’ve had a negative leaning perception of her fans ever since they sent xenophobic messages to Kris Wu in droves when his album charted better than hers. He’s chinese! He’s huge in China! In what world do you think a huge Chinese celebrity would underperform in the charts!? There’s like 2 billion people in China!

So I saw some stuff. Hate towards BTS (who have never done anything to deserve the hate they receive btw), death threats to Pete Davidson who they know is suicidal, and all sorts of corny, mean garbage.

And this was just what I found when I searched “Ariana Grande” on twitter.

I’m sure there’s some fandom slang too but I don’t like Ariana Grande’s music enough to learn her fan lingo. (not to say I dislike her music of course, I love No Tears Left To Cry, God Is A Woman, Into You, and a bunch of her other songs. I just don’t put effort into supporting artists whose b-sides I don’t consistently listen to and enjoy)

Now, those of you acquainted with twitter fans may say “but you like BTS and their fans suck!”.

This is a game of statistics my dude. BTS’s fans rarely send death threats and I’ve never seen one be xenophobic (and of course this is my opinion and it has very little influence in the world.)

I just hope Ariana Grande gets better fans. I hope in the near future we can avoid being subjected to annoying, copy-and-pasted “clapbacks” on twitter. I hope that Kris Wu will receive retribution for the hatred he’s received simply for making music. And I hope some day we’ll all wake up and realize BTS and Beyonce are producing the most consistently great pop culture content on earth and they deserve all of our attention.


I kinda just wanted to post my screenshot on my blog and here I am after writing an over 1,000 word post about things that barely matter.

Thanks for reading!

BTW, my tweet has over 25,000 views now after typing all of this.

Future Changes

Would you look at that, I’m not stuck at work until past 21:30 today!

I hate it that I feel lost when I’m not busy.

I miss that feeling of motivation to do things I like that I had in the past. I’m trying to force myself to do things like blogging so that I can maybe regain what I’ve lost.

When you don’t have as many hours in a day to do what matters to you it feels like those things matter less to you, you know?

I’m hoping to spend the rest of today, tomorrow, and parts of sunday getting my mind together. I would really like to brainstorm a way to better balance my life. It feels like I’m doing that weekly though and it never bears fruit.

Maybe things will get better once I start school and have a more consistent schedule (that’s a long shot).

I often wonder why people take the time out of their day to read my blog when I don’t really have much to say a lot of the time.

I really want to do right by my readership by crafting interesting content.

I’m thinking maybe I’ll branch out from just writing personal posts to maybe writing about fashion and such. I tried to do that towards the beginning of my blog, but I think I’m in a better place to make that sort of stuff now. I’m thinking maybe I’ll do OOTD’s and maybe reviews? Of course the personal stuff won’t go away though.

I’m gonna try to force myself to take more pictures as well because I know these walls of text can kind of be exhausting. I tend to feel a bit more proud of my posts with photos as well, so that would probably help me with my motivation.

I think once I can drive my posts may improve as well. I’ll probably feel more inspired when I’m out in the world rather than in the 2 very exotic settings of my home and my work.

I’m gonna brainstorm offline.

Thanks for reading.

Oddly Specific GIFs

What’s up?

I don’t have much to say today but I’d like to introduce you all to one of my new favorite things.

So if you weren’t around for the early-mid 2000’s internet, you may have never heard of a thing called a blinkie.

Blinkies are gifs that pretty much just blink.

Like the signs on the outside of a gas station.

So I’ve recently really loved to save oddly specific blinkies and just… look at them I guess.

Here’s a few of my favorites:


Obviously I’m partial to opossum themed blinkies.

So that’s all I’ve got for you today…

Thanks for reading.


Communities & Indoctrination

Last night I started watching some videos from a guy known as Mr. Atheist.

He’s a former member of the LDS and a lot of his content revolves around educating the public about common practices in the Church of Latter Days Saints (the mormon church) and explaining the issues in the church.

For quite a while I’ve had an odd interest in mormonism (I’ll be using the term mormonism because it’s an easy to understand term, I know they don’t like to be called mormons). I think I may have watched the John Smith episode of South Park at too young of an age and now I’ve been imprinted on.

I wasn’t raised religious, but I have had my fair share of interactions with religious people (I’m from the bible belt after all) and I really enjoy researching religion. Despite my interest, I’ve never really taken a stance for or against religion in general or any specific religion.

I think that may be because, especially when I was a kid, I felt really weird about not being religious and I really don’t like to be a person that makes any group I belong to look bad. I really don’t want to be associated with all those “atheist skeptics” who say mean things and talk over people but excuse their poor behavior with a “skeptic” attitude (I’m looking at you, thunderf00t).

I’ve had some rocky footing on the topic of mormonism for a while though, ever since I found out about the more strict branches and since I found out about Protecting Mormon Children.

I’m not going to make any direct statements about any religion right now though, I’m just going to make 2 broad statements about how I like to live.

I don’t think it’s good for any community to mask the wrongdoings of members of their community just so that their group looks better.

To give a non-religious example:

You often see on twitter, people with far left beliefs dancing around criticisms of common actions taken by other far-leftists. I think the least offensive example I can give is leftists avoiding any discussion of animal welfare because “white vegans care more about animals than they do about black people!!!”.


We shouldn’t care about other living beings because certain people have problems? We can’t care about more than one thing?

Or another one of my favorites: “there is no ethical consumption under capitalism!!!!!!!!!!!!”

This one is a great way to absolve yourself of guilt when you know that what you’re doing is wrong, but you don’t want to step outside of your comfort zone.

Or another community I see hiding wrongdoings of their comrades: sex positive feminists.

(I really seem right wing in this post looking back on it. I’m actually quite liberal, I just think it’s good to look at things with a critical eye)

You’ll often see people who place a ton of value on sex positivity avoiding any discussion of people who’ve used sex positivity as a way to coerce others into unfavorable positions. It seems like any time a young woman mentions that she ended up in sexual situations to avoid being perceived as “regressive” and “SWERF-y” by sex positive feminists, many people who define themselves as sex positive will say omething along the lines of “well nobody told you to do that” or “that isn’t sex positivity’s fault” or a personal favorite “if someone coerced you, they aren’t really sex positive!” (nice no-true-scotsman fallacy there)

Sure, these things aren’t the fault of the group or the ideology, but it’s important to note that a community can create a space in which people who wish to coerce others can feel comfortable.

Just look at tumblr and the p*dophile community that developed after people made being the slightest bit judgemental seem like a heinous crime that instantly makes you a bigot who hates equal rights.

I don’t think anyone should make children do anything that isn’t necessary for the child’s wellbeing.

This shouldn’t be a controversial opinion, but it seems like it is for many people.

I think there’s a big difference between making your kid eat some green beans and making your kid go to church every sunday.

I’m not going to directly say that making children partake in religion is indoctrination but…

Well… Thanks for reading.

I don’t think this was very well written, but I just wanted to maybe put some points out there.

Closing the Store

It feels like every time I write an entry, I’m just pulling stuff out of my *ss.

That’s what I’m doing today too.


I just reached the 1/3 mark in my korean textbook!

I really really like my textbook. Most of my study has been using online resources, but I think having a physical textbook in front of me is really helpful. I think it really helps me to focus because I can’t get notifications on a paper, you know?

I’ve gotta figure out which language I want to take as my foreign language in college. I’ve narrowed down to Mandarin, Russian, or Korean. I think I’m leaning most toward Russian because I generally have the toughest time studying Russian on my own and it’s the language I notice the least progression in with my self-study. I think I could test out of at least beginner Korean and get that credit.

My orientation is in a week and a half and I’m freaking out!!

I’m really worried I’ll panic and burst into tears in the middle of scheduling my classes or something.

*very audible sigh*

I’ve gotta start getting ready for work soon. I’m working another 9 (technically 8) hour shift today. I wish I would get scheduled to open the store more often instead of closing the store pretty much every time I work. I always end up staying up late when I close.

Oh, gosh. I just noticed the time. I’m gonna end this post now. Bye!

Thanks for reading!