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Let’s Bring Back Blog Awards

OK, lots to talk about.

I’m gonna try to organize this in as easily understandable of a way as is possible.

I want an award.

I’ve mentioned multiple times on this blog that I am a very proud lover of attention. I like when people look at me, I like applause (it was my biggest motivator when I was acting), I like praise, I even like when people stare at me. In fact I would go so far as to say that I love those things.

One thing that I think my attention seeking journey is missing is a laundry list of accolades. I love it when people talk about Beyonce (my absolute idol) and they mention that she’s the third most decorated musician ever.

Well, a fun fact about me is that I’ve never really won anything.

I won a metal for a robot building competition (it was actually 2 metals, but I wanna seem humble) when I was 11 and I have 2 “AP scholar with distinction” awards, but other than that I can’t think of a time that I actually won in a competition. I was never an athlete when I was a kid and I was never a particularly memorable person when I did choir and theatre, so it’s no surprise that I don’t know what winning feels like.

That’s very disheartening though.

I want to feel proud of myself!

So where do blog awards factor into this?

Well, I don’t like to admit it but I was huge fan of Xiaxue when I was a kid. Every day I would read her blog and go through her archives. I even looked through the hate site she made for herself!

But of all of the content Xiaxue has put out in her over 15 years blogging and instagramming and doing whatever she does nowadays, my favorite thing she ever put online was her blog post about the 2011 Nuffnang Asia-Pacific Blog Awards. It seemed so glamorous and so interesting and it seemed like something to really be proud of but above all it seemed approachable. It felt like if you just made a blog and worked hard enough, you could get glory. That was why I started my awful first blog back in 2012 and that attainable glamour is a big motivator when I can’t get out a post on here.

So if you didn’t read all of that, I just really wanna win something for once.

What happened to blog awards?

I don’t really know.

I’ve been meditating on this idea for about a month and a half, and I’ve done quite a bit of research. I found one active blog award situation in Ireland for Irish bloggers so that was disappointing. I also found some “if you get tagged you win and then you have to tag 15 other bloggers” style blog awards but that isn’t what I want.

I don’t wanna win a meaningless award based on the fact that I’m good acquaintances with someone.

I want a popular vote.

 

What are we gonna do about this?

Well, I want to see if anyone would participate in this first.

So here’s my call to action:

If you want to have the chance to win an award or you want to see some of your favorite bloggers possibly win awards, please complete this google form. It’ll take like 2 minutes at the most.

https://goo.gl/forms/PBpZYpVD7lbXUxMU2

If you can’t complete the google form, please like this post to show that you want a real, competitive blog award “ceremony” and/or comment about what you want me to do for this.

I’m thinking I’d like to maybe crowd fund this I can get real trophies made (and maybe give out a small cash prize) and I’ll also make a little thumbnail so you can put it on your blog as a widget? I don’t know I’ll plan more if people actually want to do this. I know I can’t create an actual award show because nobody would fly somewhere for a silly blog award nowadays. If I get really into this I may even use my own money, but that’s not a promise.

This will probably be pretty makeshift, but I think it could be cool.

I really wanna make this happen.

So please fill out my google form!

*authors note: I know this is probably anticlimactic since I’ve been working on it for like 5 days but I had to research blog awards and I’ve even gone so far as to figure out how much it would cost to make a trophy and I’ve looked into crowd funding websites, like I’ve really been putting effort into this concept that might not even happen. So please give me feedback and tell me what you want to come of this. ♡♡♡*

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Good News x6

Ok.

I need to get a post out again.

Luckily I’m not on a time crunch today so hopefully this won’t be quite as bad of an entry as yesterdays.

I have a lot of things to say that I think will only give me about 2 paragraphs of content each (maximum) so I’ll give each topic a header.

Good Post Coming Up

I’ve been working on a blog post for about 4 days at this point that I hope you guys will like. I don’t wanna reveal anything about it, but it should be posted tomorrow or the next day. I feel like the post I have brewing will really be a big stepping stone in my blogging career, for real. It should hopefully draw new readers to my blog and make a few fellow bloggers happy. Are you excited yet?

BiscuitsXMonsters Put Up My Picture!

I think I told you guys that they asked me to take some product photos for their online store an well… the photos are up! I feel like a model or something!

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Do you see me?
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You should now!

I’ll link to their store since they’re so nice to me: http://biscuitsxmonsters.storenvy.com

P.S you can use my code “dearmikah” for free shipping on their site, I don’t get paid for it so if you hate me don’t worry you won’t pay me for buying some of the cute stuff on there. I genuinely support the brand.

Work Update

As you guys may know, I work at a clothing store. I make a little over minimum wage and I don’t get a ton of hours because I’m part time but guess what…

My boss offered to promote me to a assistant manager!

So I should be getting more hours (I won’t let this get in the way of my writing) and a raise! Alongside getting a title of course.

A manager quit so my store manager wants to fill the space she left. She also asked me if I’m interested in doing visuals for the store and of course I’m into that so…. YAY!

I love this!

Hopefully I’ll be able to put more money toward my blog with my raise so you can have an even better experience!

Republished Article

No, my article I didn’t like hasn’t been edited, but I do have some good freelancing news!

My Seedling Magazine article will be republished on littlegreenseedling.com so you guys can read it without having to download a copy of Seedling! This is to get the word out about the great pieces in Seedling so if you go over there and like what you see, please download their magazine!

I’m not being paid to say this by the way. If I ever have a real sponsored post, I’ll disclose it because I know you guys trust me and I really value that.

I’ll remind you guys of this on the day it’s put up on the website so you can click a link directly to it.

Bangs Update

I still want bangs and I’m still excited to cut them!

Bullet Journal Spread

My bujo spread for this week is both cute and disappointing. It’s Oogie-Boogie themed and I’m not a great freehand artist so my drawing of Oogie isn’t wonderful, but the colors are great. I love my tombow dual brush pens, they’re so vibrant! I used them for almost the whole spread.

P.S I know The Nightmare Before Christmas is a christmas movie, but I love Oogie-Boogie and I think his colors fit better for my halloweentime spreads. I do have plans for a Nightmare Before Christmas themed christmas spread though so if you love that movie like I do, be patient.

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My Oogie-Boogie looks like Patrick from Spongebob got the suds 😦

So yay!

Today’s post feels good to me and I like making positive content sometimes. I’m really not as negative as I seem, I’m just a pessimist– it’s different.

Thank you so much for reading!

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I’m Not Gonna Not Post

I have no reason to not post today.

I kinda had no big goals for the day and I had no plans, but here I am. The sun’s almost down and I still haven’t written yet.

But at the same time, here I am, writing a blog entry as we speak.

 

You know what I wish would make a comeback? Cell phone charms.

Do you remember when every phone had a little notch in it to put a charm in? No you can’t find any phone case let alone phone with charm capabilities. My phone case can work around that because there’s a thin bit near where the little flap covers the ringer switch.

So I think with my upcoming paycheck I’m gonna buy this phone charm I found on etsy. I’ll update you on my phone charm journey later.

I’m still kinda flustered about my ruined guest post.

I actually quite liked the article I wrote (until it was posted) but whatever, I got a good number of new views in the past few days.

I think I’m gonna reach my view goal for my blog this month. Last month I was 9 views away 😦

Oooo you know what I’ve discovered?

If you combine pasta with aldi marinara sauce and the aldi vegan mozzarella, it tastes exactly like a stouffers cheese lasagna.

I used to eat those when I was vegetarian and they were a delight so I’m pumped that I’ve been able to replicate the flavor in a dairy free way.

If you have an aldi near you, please buy their vegan stuff. I want them to see the demand and keep producing it because good god that mozzarella and that chocolate ice cream are life changing.

I also like their vegan potstickers and black bean burgers.

I hope they make even more vegan stuff.

Yesterday I went to aldi and I wore a coat and shorts and I could hear the lady behind me lecturing her daughter to never dress like me. haha.

That may be good advice honestly.

I like the way I dress though. I think I stand out in a crowd and my clothes get the point across that I want to get across.

I’ve written over 30 words so I think this entry is sufficient so I’ll sign off here.

Thanks for reading! Bye!

day in the life

October 5th, 2018

Today’s a big day!

I’ll get to things as they happen but here’s a synopsis of October 5th.

I woke up at around 9:00. I had actually woken up for about an hour at 6:00 but I ended up falling back asleep much to my chagrin.

I woke up and went to the living room with my laptop where I edited my final draft of an article I sent to be put up on another website (I’ll link it when it’s published). I sent it to the owner of the website and then I got an email…

My first article in a magazine was published today!

I have a piece in Seedling Magazine !

YAY!

I got my payment for the article a few days ago but it didn’t feel real until I saw it!

Please go download and read the magazine!

Here’s another link if you didn’t notice the earlier one:    https://littlegreenseedling.com/magazine/

I’m hoping this article will drive a little more traffic to my site and hopefully kickstart my writing “career”.

I then went over to my photo area because I’ve been asked by the nice people at BiscuitsXMonsters asked me to take some product pictures for them! My pictures should be on the website soon! (if you wanna buy something from them my discount code is: dearmikah)

Here’s one of the pictures I took:

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So after my super eventful few hours, we got mail. I didn’t get what I was hoping would arrive today. 😦 I thought my 2nd milkgirl sweater would arrive but it still hasn’t. That’s fine though, I’m willing to wait.

I also applied for a gas card today. I tried to apply for a credit card a while ago and I got rejected because I don’t have a credit score yet since I’ve never had a credit card. Does that sound dumb to you too? I’m hoping I’ll get accepted for this.

I’m hoping to get in a good Japanese study session today. So to do that I’m gonna have to stop writing this post soon.

I have a video uploading on youtube right now so if you don’t keep up with my youtube channel… new video!

It’s a mukbang.

Well I guess I’ll go now.

Bye for now!

 

 

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I Did It

Well everybody,

I posted every day in September.

I think by doing this I’ve gotten what I wanted out of the experiment in full.

I’ve gotten over my writers block. I’ve gotten better at setting aside time to blog. I’ve received quite a few new bog followers and readers. I think my content has improved. I’ve begun to appreciate my blog even more. I’ve made taking photos a bigger part of my life and while doing that I think my photography has gotten better.

I think I’m gonna try to maintain the habits I’ve made while blogging daily for the rest of my blogging career.

So thank you so much if you haven’t gotten annoyed by my entries, and I hope you’ll continue to read my blog!

 

Morning Pages

Morning Pages: September 26th, 2018

Hello.

Wanna read 900 words of nonsense?

You’re in the right place.

I have a video uploading to youtube right now (I’ll embed it if it finishes uploading while I’m typing) and it’s kinda nonsensical. I wanna make really consistent videos on there rather than videos that don’t have any unifying factor but I also just wanna post whatever I film. It’s tough to figure out which feeling is stronger.

I kinda wanna start making beauty videos. I may start posting those in conjunction with other types of videos. I think I have some unique perspectives when it comes to stuff like hair and makeup because I rarely see people who do their hair and makeup like I do.

You know what, I’m glad I started typing this because I’ve decided that’s what I’m gonna do.

Did you guys know they sell vegan cheese at Aldi now!?

It’s really good too!

If you shop at Aldi and they have the vegan cheese in stock, I recommend you buy some. The mozzarella shreds have that bite to them that dairy mozzarella has and it’s really nice. It also gets stringy when it melts like dairy mozzarella.

I finally surpassed 300 instagram followers last night! My big goal is to reach 1000 before my next birthday (August of 2019), so it’s pretty exciting to be 3/10 of the way there.

Instagram is great. I think a lot of people are unfairly critical of social media in general, but especially instagram. In my opinion, instagram is like a magazine but you get to personally curate what you want to see. A lot of people say it gives people body dysmorphia and eating disorders, but I think that’s a super disrespectful take. People with body dysmorphia are mentally ill and so are people with eating disorders. As a person who is literally recovering from an eating disorder, I think it’s super reductive to blame an app for people experiencing eating disorders. I think maybe if we wanted to reduce the amount of eating disorder patients, we should try to focus on debunking body based stereotypes. I know a lot of my ED stuff comes from not wanting to seem lazy, tough, or manly. If we didn’t associate higher weights with negative traits like laziness and masculinity (in women, I know masculinity isn’t a bad thing) we would likely see fewer people going to unhealthy extents to lose weight.

But back to instagram.

I love being able to see what a person values in life. I think what a person put on their instagram page is very telling as to what they value. For example, I follow a friend who really values the inside jokes she shares with her friends so a lot of her posts are cryptic inside jokes. In my case, I really value aesthetics and nature so my entire feed it visually focused and my captions are particularly uninteresting. I refuse to post things on my instagram that I don’t find aesthetically pleasing whereas a lot of people will post something they may find ugly because they value it.

That’s cool!

You know what’s making me kinda sad?

Tumblr is dying out.

Why couldn’t it be reddit!?

For years, tumblr was my number one social media network and it’s depressing to see that most of the people on there now are discourse arguers and men looking for girls to send creepy messages to. I miss back when there were people who had personality based tumblrs. I don’t wanna name names because I follow a lot of the people who come to mind on twitter and they’re ashamed of their tumblr days so I won’t embarrass them. You don’t see a lot of people who’s tumblrs are about them as people anymore and that sucks. My tumblr is still like that, I post the photos I don’t think fit my instagram on there mainly and the occasional crossposted blog post.

I wish reddit would die instead of tumblr.

I don’t understand why anyone is voluntarily going on there at this point. The layout is ugly, it’s crawling with neonazis, and it’s not new user friendly (I know because I tried to give reddit a real chance recently, terrible idea). ugh.

I guess since I’m talking about social media, I’ll keep that theme.

Facebook should die with reddit.

Is that a super hot take?

It’s also got an ugly layout and is also crawling with neonazis. I mainly use facebook to keep up with my family members who don’t use other websites. I also occasionally take part in facebook group threads for bloggers and stuff like that but that doesn’t make facebook better.

Hmm… I’ve only got about 120 words left.

I’ll tell you about my plans for today.

I’m gonna try to film another video, photograph Maddie, and go to the psychiatrist. I think when I get home for the night and I feel like I’ve done everything I want to do for the day, I wanna watch Black Panther again. I adore Black Panther.

I think I should focus on Russian for my daily studies today. It’s been a few too many days since my last good Russian study session. I think in the coming few weeks I’m gonna try to get back into using memrise. I used to be a big memrise user, in fact when I was 14 it was the only way I studied for about 8 months.

ooo. we’re at 905 words.

My video is still uploading so I guess I’ll embed my youtube video in a different post. sorry 😦

Thanks for reading!

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We’re Getting Somewhere

I started my “blog every day in September” challenge for myself because I felt I was making lower quality content than I prefer.

Well I think I’m hitting a stride, dudes!

I think my last like 5 posts have been great and it’s shown because my daily views have been 2x their average! yay!!!!!!!

I love blogging and it makes me so happy when I’m rewarded for my efforts!

I’ve been thinking a lot about how blog awards used to be a big deal. I’d love to win a blog award some day and I think if I wanna reach that goal I need to make great content like I’ve been making.

I guess I should give some tips for anyone who’s trying to improve their content in teh way I have.

  • make a lot of posts (try every day)
  • try to take pictures (visual elements make blog entries more interesting for a lot of people)
  • try to have a narrative center
  • post whenever an idea comes to mind
  • try writing morning pages
  • be absolutely shameless

With the improvements I’ve been noticing on my blog I think I should focus some energy on my youtube channel now. I set a goal to post 5 times on my channel this month and I’ve only posted twice. 😦

I’m still gonna post daily for the rest of this month but I’m just gonna do my best to post a few more youtube videos.

I’ve tried to film a 2 videos this week but I hated them so much that I deleted them half way through editing. 😦

So my goal is to not delete any videos for the rest of September and hopefully that’ll get me to 5 videos. Genius right?

To end this post I’ll give you a photo I took before filming a video I deleted.

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I’m not yelling, I’m making faces.

 

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My Favorite Weather and Other Stuff

I’m very happy today because the weather is exactly to my liking.

I’m very strongly affected by the weather when it comes to my mood and if the weather is in my opinion bad, I’m less motivated, less enthusiastic, harder to excite, and more sedentary.

So what constitutes good weather to me?

  • clouds
  • rain
  • cold temperatures (even though it never gets truly cold where I live)
  • snow is my ultimate favorite but again, it only snows like every other year
  • dark skies
  • when the grass looks technicolor bright
  • petrichor scent
  • the general season of winter

I’ve always wondered if I may have seasonal affective disorder (or whatever it’s called) but I’m depressed in summer rather than winter.

I’m so excited that summer is ending!

I sometimes wish I was born in winter so I could have a real birthday celebration. In summer everyone is busy going on vacation and doing summer stuff that it feels like I’d be inconveniencing my friends if I invited them to celebrate my birthday with me, so for the past like 4-5 years I haven’t tried to do anything for my birthday.

Next year I think I’m gonna try to throw myself a birthday party for the first time in my life. Don’t get confused and think I’ve never had a birthday party: I’ve had a few. I’ve just never thrown one for myself.

It’s on my bucket list to have a real birthday party and I think if I start planning early I’ll be over the anxiety in time for next August.

That sounds crazy when I read it.

Ugh! Poptart just pissed on my thigh high boots 😦

I semi-dried them, I’ll clean them off after posting this.

I thought this would be a good substantial post about weather but honestly I wanna write about other things in my life right now.

My mom got me a gift that makes me really happy yesterday.

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The back says “Love always, Marshmallow”

I wish Mel was still here. We should be getting his ashes soon and I’m hoping to be finished with the scrapbook page I’m making before we get them.

The page is red and white themed because I’m 90% sure his favorite color was red. All his favorite foods and toys were red so I’m just drawing conclusions but I like to give traits like that to all of my pets. Sometimes people cringe when I say things about my pets favorite colors and songs but I can really see how certain stimuli change their demeanor! Like Poptart loves older VIXX songs while Peanut likes City and Color. I’m sorry for these people that they don’t connect with animals the way I do.

I need to get some pictures of Marshmallow printed because I need them for my memorial and to frame. He was so pretty.

I can’t wait to live my dream of having a small house near the mountains with a herd of chianina cattle on the property and a ton of rabbits in the house. I think to memorialize Mel I’m gonna name all my future rabbits M names. I already have Marzipan, Mochi, Mango, and Mellocreme chosen. I’d prefer they all be food names but it’s tough to come up with M food names for rabbits. I like giving all of my pets fun names. It kinda creeps me out when people have dogs named Bill.

I always wished I was named Cinnamon when I was a kid (my club penguin name was cinnamoncyrus because I loved the name Cinnamon and Miley Cyrus). When/ if I have kids of my own loins (I already have names chosen) I want them to all have interesting names. Not if  they’re adopted, I wouldn’t force a kid to change their name to fit my theme of anything.

I also went by Krystal and Venus for short periods of my childhood. I wish I started liking my name at a younger age. I really like it now because it’s pretty unique and people think it’s cool. When I was a kid though, teachers would always think I was a boy before meeting me and kids made so many jokes about my name. I think it’s kinda cool that people think Mikah is a stage name. I really get messages on tumblr and emails asking if it’s my real name. It is! I’ll add that to my FAQ. 

Maybe some day Mikah will be a name like Beyonce where people name their kids that and then their kid feels like they have to live up to their name (I know a few younger girls [born around 2004] named Beyonce and they feel like they live in a shadow).

Fingers crossed!

Thanks for reading!

(❁´◡`❁)

 

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Don’t Stalk Me ♡

Well I’m anxious.

Last night I watched a video from a guy named Quinton Reviews about being a youtuber and starting a channel and stuff like that and one thing he said kinda got to me.

He said that when you’re starting a channel you need to be very private about yourself i.e not posting landmarks in your area and not talking about where you’re from. He said he doesn’t love that people use his online username when they see him in real life and he’s afraid of being stalked now that his audience is big.

I guess since I’m an attention seeker I don’t hate the idea of somebody recognizing me in a grocery store (once I’m a person that matters), but I don’t love the idea of being stalked.

I like to imagine that people don’t have a good idea of where I’m from because I don’t really share stuff like what school I went to or even the city I live in but still I’m very aware of how easy it is to figure out where somebody is from via looking at their IRL friends info or tracking their IP address.

Do you remember the cicada 3301 conspiracy scavenger hunt thing?

I remember listening to the audio tracks when people leaked them to the public.

But the reason I mention it is because a bit of the hunt involved tracking IP addresses.

It’s weird to think about the percentage of technologically illiterate people in comparison to people who can fully figure out what somebody else is about.

But to my comfort, the majority of people who use the internet are technologically illiterate and also likely don’t care about me enough to track me down and shoot through my windows like that dude did to that twitch streamer.

Part of this post came to mind as I was taking pictures of a rainbow and a sign showing the miles to a city near mine was obstructing my view.

I did eventually get a non-city-disclosing photo thought and I think you guys should see it.

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So if you’re a person who’s super interested in me and you have the urge to stalk me, maybe don’t. I’m very nice and if you comment or reach out to me I’m very likely to respond, so you won’t have to track me down to have a nice conversation with me. ♡

While you’re here, you might as well follow my blog! I post daily and sometimes the posts are good! ♡

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A Look at 13 Year Old Me

I found an old SD card from when I was in 8th grade recently.

I only got the courage to look at the files on it today and wow…

I was annoying.

I’m not going to pretend that I’m a completely non-annoying person nowadays because I honestly annoy myself sometimes but whew!

I feel bad for everyone that spent time around me at that age.

I guess since I love embarassing myself, I’ll show you some of the astounding photos I took in 2013 (photos and videos with others in them are excluded but trust me those photos are awful too).

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I thought taking blurry photos was the height of comedy (i still kinda do)
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take note of the deep side part
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does every girl have a colored mascara phase?
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I really wasn’t as ugly as I thought I was
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This was my instagram profile photo for over a year.
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I think N.O from BTS is playing on the laptop in the background… (I still like that song)
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and in this one Voodoo Doll from VIXX is on in the background (no regrets, still holds up)
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This was the first photo I ever uploaded to tumblr… Don’t try to find it on there, I deleted that blog

I think someday I’m gonna look back at the way I am now and feel the same gut wrenching horror that I feel when I look through this SD card today, but that’s not gonna stop me from being me for now.

It kinda makes me uncomfortable to see the similarities between 13 year old me and 18 year old me (i.e an undying love of eyeliner and a habit of taking a lot of pictures of myself).

It also makes me sad to be reminded of my mental state during this phase. I remember always feeling like I was reaching for something that I could never grasp. I still feel that way really often. At this age and throughout high school, I felt like I was constantly getting close to getting the approval that I so desperately craved, but it would never come in full. I was the understudy. I was in the background. I was around in case something bad happened to the people that mattered.

I don’t think these feelings of inadequacy will ever go away but at least my braces did.

So thanks for walking down this horrible, unpaved memory lane with me. I hope my braces didn’t gross you out.