Liveblogging the 2019 Grammys

*Disclaimer: if you don’t like BTS this may not be the post for you, because I’m really only interested in BTS, Gaga, Janelle Monae, Dolly, and Cardi B.*

  • It took me over 40 minutes to find my remote to the TV…
  • Ok, this is gonna be a long night. The red carpet and preshow are 3 hours :/
  • oop. Tierra Whack is here? I love her!?
  • *filler*
  • BTS have arrived.
  • I have started crying.
  • Wow they have RM in glasses… We’ve won, everyone.
  • Now we search twitter for the other red carpet interviews…
  • oh, BTS lost in their category, it’s ok at least they lost to St Vincent. (my 2nd choice)
  • *filler* (btw I’m not saying the people are filler, I’m just putting these in to show a progression of time)
  • DOLLY!!!! I forgot Dolly Parton was coming. God I love her. There are very few people who are as inspiring to me as she is. And she’s still kickin it in the red dress!!
  • Cardi just got out of the car, guys. She looks gorgeous as always.
  • Oh my god they’re interviewing Lady Gaga. She looks so good!!!!!!!!! GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • They keep showing promos for how they’re gonna show La La Land on E……. Gonna have to skip that………..
  • Can I sound dumb for a second? Who is Shawn Mendes? I hear people talk about him and he’s being interviewed right now but…. I’ve never seen a photo of him before and I don’t think I’ve ever heard his music…………… :/
  • Oh god. Joy Villa’s here. Why do they invite her? She’s dressed up as the border wall and has “build the wall” painted on her *ss…………. yikes
  • Yo what? They just showed a guy that looks just like Shawn Mendes and said he’s Charlie Puth? Is there a technical issue or am I just blind? (don’t take my person differentiation seriously though, I can’t tell Hugh Jackman and Robert Downy Junior apart apparently. THEY HAVE THE SAME FACE!!!)
  • I just saw Cardi’s full outfit and I audibly gasped!!!!! Say what you want, but she can turn a look!!!!!!!!
  • And Janelle Monae is turning a look too? I’m not gonna make it.
  • The show just started.
  • They have C****** C****** opening the show? K….
  • Well… the camera work is great.
  • Lele Pons is up there?
  • Well, J Balvin’s doing Mi Gente. A good song. Wish Beyonce could perform her verse…… But we don’t get nice things. Although I don’t know if I’d want Beyonce associated with this opening………..
  • Haha, you wanna hear a funny story? Back when they did the 52nd grammys I thought the said 50 second grammys and I was like “why are they so short?”
  • *gasp* MICHELLE OBAMA!?
  • Jesus Christ Lady Gaga is radiant.
  • They need to warn you when they’re gonna cut to BTS. I just saw Jungkook and screeched.
  • If they cut to Yoongi I’m gonna scream.
  • OK. Shawn Mendes is performing. He’s good.
  • Wait.
  • He looks like a MAGCON boy.
  • I googled it and oh my god, my mind. He was a MAGCON boy!!! Well he moved up, huh? Poor guy had to be around Nash Grier 😦
  • MILEY!?
  • I know this is controversial, but I think Miley Cyrus will be considered a legend in the very near future.
  • Please please please give Gaga everything she’s nominated for.
  • Boom.
  • It’s what she deserves. (best pop duo/group performance)
  • Did you know that we stan forever? Just wanted to make sure you know.
  • Ok. Miss Musgraves came to play with the big kids. I can respect a gentle ballad.
  • Lady Gaga’s goin through it. I think she’s gonna cry all night.
  • YES! YES! Janelle Monae!
  • Sorry, I had to just watch.
  • I adore her.
  • Song of the Year: This is America
  • ok
  • not mad, not happy. neutral.
  • Red Hot Chili Peppers and Post Malone?
  • This will probably be genuinely good.
  • It sucks that people always make fun of Post Malone for his looks. I like him quite a bit. I don’t think he’s bad looking either.
  • He’s a good singer.
  • And we have a contender for the best performance of the night.
  • That was great!
  • Oh man.
  • Dolly Parton’s about to perform!!!!!!
  • Katy Perry’s going all out, huh?
  • *audible gasp*
  • C’MON WHITE DRESS!!!!!!!!
  • YES!
  • Jolene, the best country song ever made.
  • J-hope dancing to Dolly Parton is all I ever needed.
  • I’ve started to cry again.
  • love an icon
  • H.E.R is up next
  • Honestly I’ve heard I think 2 of her songs
  • Solid.
  • CARDI!!!!!!!
  • wow. opulence.
  • I love this song, man. (Money) and god she’s hot
  • jeez Offset just made a total creeper face
  • I love Cardi
  • wow, Alicia Keys playing 2 pianos. sickening
  • I forget the name of the guys performing… they’re good though
  • Best Rap Song: God’s Plan
  • sure
  • wonderful speech
  • miss Diana Ross is still astounding at 75 years of age
  • It’s Gaga’s time.
  • I just can’t explain my love.
  • I got distracted
  • Travis Scott is performing now.
  • oh hell yeah, let’s mosh
  • It’s really weird to think about how he has a daughter with Kylie Jenner. They just don’t seem like they’d go together
  • motown tribute.
  • I don’t think I’ve ever heard Jennifer Lopez sing…
  • Like I’ve heard a studio song from her, but never a performance
  • Lot’s of costume changes
  • Ne-yo. Haven’t seen him in a while.
  • aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • MY BOYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • yay! congrats H.E.R
  • I can’t focus on her though cause BTS are up there…
  • Wow… Taehyung touched that trophy. She could sell that for like 20x the price of another grammy, knowing how crazy BTS fans are.
  • He’s gonna touch another one in the near future…..
  • ooo they’re playing her off
  • I hate it when that happens
  • Brandy Carlisle up next
  • what a nice tone. I love women in country music, honestly. I can’t think of a bad one.
  • ooo fringe
  • my favorite color is fringe – Willam Belli
  • sorry, back to the grammys
  • this is wonderful. I don’t think I’ve seen so much country at the grammys ever.
  • Chloe and Halle are on. They’re great. haunting.
  • Cardi B- best rap album
  • huge shock! I thought it’d go to Mac Miller of Travis Scott. not mad about it though
  • Offset’s all up on her…
  • “maybe I need to start smoking weed” we love a comedian.
  • ok… Offset needs to back up
  • that was sweet.
  • St Vincent and Dua Lipa have matching bobs
  • are they gonna kiss…?
  • aw Alessia Cara and Bob Newhart are cute.
  • yay! Dua Lipa wins best new artist.
  • aw. the in memoriam 😦
  • Aretha Franklin tribute.
  • so much better than her funeral. maybe I shouldn’t rank the tributes to a dead woman, huh?
  • I just love to see Fantasia. She spices up anything.
  • whoa! Yolanda Adams coming through.
  • Song of the year: This is America
  • ok
  • )can I say something privately to you? I really don’t like the song. It’s just not listenable for me, it’s a good concept though.)
  • please please please Dirty Computer for Album of the Year
  • Golden Hour- Kasey Musgraves
  • that’s a big surprise
  • not mad though
  • wow.
  • Now we wait for the BTS post award show live stream.
  • I wont make you read that though.

Thanks for reading if you were able to get through these over 1000 words of nonsense!


Astrology Jokes

I enjoyed writing an opinion piece the other day.

I used to write roughly one opinion piece per week a long while ago, but I kinda stopped writing them. I think I’m gonna try to write one whenever I have a good thought about something.

Today’s topic is gonna be astrology.

I think I’ve been witness to a pretty interesting trend that seems especially apparent in my age range.

I don’t really know how to name this trend but I’d describe it as a renewed interest in superstition. (Somebody’s probably gonna get mad at me for calling these things superstitions)

It seems like the people who’ve developed these interests really overlap a lot. Interests these people hold include but aren’t limited to:

  • witchcraft/ wicca
  • paganism
  • astrology
  • “the cosmos”
  • pagan imagery
  • conflating religion and “traditionalism”
  • anarchism
  • “alternative aesthetics”
  • etc etc, you know the people I’m talking about

So to get you off the edge of your eat I’m just gonna say it.

I don’t believe in astrology.

or wicca, or paganism, or that christians are bigots, or that hot pink hair looks good on most people

I’ve noticed especially on twitter that there’s a big trend or people who love astrology making the same joke about how boring people don’t believe in astrology and it pisses me off.

This trend seems painfully similar to how so many preachers/ministers/whatever they’re called will make making fun of atheists a crux of multiple sermons.

I really, truly do not care in the slightest about people who think astrology is a good explanation for happening in the world, I swear.

I do care about dismissive, straw-manning, self-righteous dweebs though.

Is it that hard to not be annoying?

I sure as hell don’t believe in astrology but I’m not telling people who do that they’re idiots. Why are so many skeptical people doing that?

And astrology-believers…

Stop it with the jokes.

They were probably funny for a grand total of 3 tweets.

It’s stale now.

Watch some stand up, I swear it’s better than this “every person I’ve ever met who doesn’t believe in astrology is a boring straight white man heblehblehblehbleh” tweet that y’all are changing 3 words to and reposting for your own gain.

I’ll even recommend you some comedians:

  • Joel Kim Booster
  • John Mulaney
  • Hannah Gadsby
  • Mike Birbiglia
  • Bert Kreischer
  • Iliza Schleschinger
  • geez, watch between two ferns, just stop tweeting the same thing over and over


Communities & Indoctrination

Last night I started watching some videos from a guy known as Mr. Atheist.

He’s a former member of the LDS and a lot of his content revolves around educating the public about common practices in the Church of Latter Days Saints (the mormon church) and explaining the issues in the church.

For quite a while I’ve had an odd interest in mormonism (I’ll be using the term mormonism because it’s an easy to understand term, I know they don’t like to be called mormons). I think I may have watched the John Smith episode of South Park at too young of an age and now I’ve been imprinted on.

I wasn’t raised religious, but I have had my fair share of interactions with religious people (I’m from the bible belt after all) and I really enjoy researching religion. Despite my interest, I’ve never really taken a stance for or against religion in general or any specific religion.

I think that may be because, especially when I was a kid, I felt really weird about not being religious and I really don’t like to be a person that makes any group I belong to look bad. I really don’t want to be associated with all those “atheist skeptics” who say mean things and talk over people but excuse their poor behavior with a “skeptic” attitude (I’m looking at you, thunderf00t).

I’ve had some rocky footing on the topic of mormonism for a while though, ever since I found out about the more strict branches and since I found out about Protecting Mormon Children.

I’m not going to make any direct statements about any religion right now though, I’m just going to make 2 broad statements about how I like to live.

I don’t think it’s good for any community to mask the wrongdoings of members of their community just so that their group looks better.

To give a non-religious example:

You often see on twitter, people with far left beliefs dancing around criticisms of common actions taken by other far-leftists. I think the least offensive example I can give is leftists avoiding any discussion of animal welfare because “white vegans care more about animals than they do about black people!!!”.


We shouldn’t care about other living beings because certain people have problems? We can’t care about more than one thing?

Or another one of my favorites: “there is no ethical consumption under capitalism!!!!!!!!!!!!”

This one is a great way to absolve yourself of guilt when you know that what you’re doing is wrong, but you don’t want to step outside of your comfort zone.

Or another community I see hiding wrongdoings of their comrades: sex positive feminists.

(I really seem right wing in this post looking back on it. I’m actually quite liberal, I just think it’s good to look at things with a critical eye)

You’ll often see people who place a ton of value on sex positivity avoiding any discussion of people who’ve used sex positivity as a way to coerce others into unfavorable positions. It seems like any time a young woman mentions that she ended up in sexual situations to avoid being perceived as “regressive” and “SWERF-y” by sex positive feminists, many people who define themselves as sex positive will say omething along the lines of “well nobody told you to do that” or “that isn’t sex positivity’s fault” or a personal favorite “if someone coerced you, they aren’t really sex positive!” (nice no-true-scotsman fallacy there)

Sure, these things aren’t the fault of the group or the ideology, but it’s important to note that a community can create a space in which people who wish to coerce others can feel comfortable.

Just look at tumblr and the p*dophile community that developed after people made being the slightest bit judgemental seem like a heinous crime that instantly makes you a bigot who hates equal rights.

I don’t think anyone should make children do anything that isn’t necessary for the child’s wellbeing.

This shouldn’t be a controversial opinion, but it seems like it is for many people.

I think there’s a big difference between making your kid eat some green beans and making your kid go to church every sunday.

I’m not going to directly say that making children partake in religion is indoctrination but…

Well… Thanks for reading.

I don’t think this was very well written, but I just wanted to maybe put some points out there.

things i’m gonna get better at

this post is gonna be lowercase again because i have next to no energy.

sometimes when bad things happen to me i use that as a catalyst for change and this recent tragedy hasn’t done that for me so i’m gonna motivate myself artificially.

here’s some things i’m gonna get better at:

  • singing
  • russian
  • dancing
  • balance
  • flexibility
  • being less easily brought to tears
  • caligraphy
  • drawing

today i really thought about the future i want, a future where i feel really appreciated and wanted and i’ve made the epiphany that if i want to attract high caliber things/opportunities/people then i need to be a high caliber person. once i have my big break people are gonna say “wow she’s a natural” and i won’t correct them but inside i’ll know that i did things myself and they didn’t come to me.

that sounds so cheesy and pinterest-y.

i sound like one of those soundcloud rappers who always talks about the grind, whatever that is.

but i swear to you these things are gonna happen in my life:

  • i’m gonna be famous
  • i’m gonna have a fulfilling marriage
  • i’m gonna have a bunch of extremely happy pets
  • i’m gonna have hip length hair (in it’s natural state)
  • i’m gonna have enough money to just buy things and not worry

i don’t believe in hippy shit like the law of attraction but i do believe in the chase and this chick is gonna chase for the rest of her life.

i can’t believe i called myself a chick. honestly i just didn’t wanna say “this b*tch” because my family reads my blog but who cares anymore.

we’re all gonna die.

does that counteract the awful pinterest quoteness of this post?

you know who the worst type of person is?

people who just spout quotes at you when you feel bad as though some regurgitated string of words from ghandi is gonna make you stop crying. those people suck.

in general optimists like that annoy me to no end. i try not to discuss my disdain for blind optimism too much because people tend to get mad at me when i mention that i may even in the slightest be a pessimist as though that’s like being a criminal, but who cares, as  i said before: we’re all gonna die.

as a side note, i don’t think people tend to understand the tone of my posts. this is exemplified when people get extremely concerned over posts that are neutral in tone at worst while being happy for me when i make posts that for me are extremely sad and full of pain. i don’t think a lot of people understand my speech patterns.

i wish i was tough enough to always say what’s on my mind but i’m not at all.

i’m so scared of people who know me sending me discouraging emails and stuff like that.

& please don’t tell me to not care about what other people think either because i have some bad news: what other people think of you is all that you are to them.

like, people always act in this moral nihilist way where they say to “do you” and “don’t worry what others think” as though your actions don’t have consequences or greater social implications. the worst part of this is that they do it under the guise of acceptance and optimism as if what they’re implying isn’t the most dark sh*t in the world!

you especially see this from anti-vegans as thought the meat industry (and supporting it) doesn’t cause immense suffering, but who cares what i think right?

i’m just rambling and complaining right now aren’t i?

let’s end this post here.